I'm sorry to really stray from the topic of this blog but hopefully someone out there may beable to tell me something, sometime about the existence of spirits and lights.
I may have seen a spirit. It's hard for me to fathom whether it was a dream or it was reality. If you had asked me if I believed in ghosts and spirits, I would have said yes but that I have never personally seen one myself. I think I have finally seen one for myself.
On Monday, someone I knew passed away early in the morning. I can't mention too much details suffice to say that I have known him for over 8 years now and I knew he had cancer and that death was a possibility but it still was a shock when it happened. He was full of life and as life was given and now taken away by whatever greater entity is out there.
This year is horrible. Earlier in the year, I attended a funeral of someone who was dear to me and those that I love. This Thursday, another funeral. It is a sad, sad year. Is it possible to have a heavy heart? Is it possible to feel sadness that beyond such that even tears does not come sometimes?
On Tuesday, I tossed and turned all night and couldn't help thinking about Monday and our loss. Closer to dawn, but not quite dawn, I may have been awake or asleep - it was hard to tell but when I dream, my dreams are usually set at someplace else in some unknown land. This dream or reality had me lying in bed in the bedroom and that's why it felt real and perhaps why it didn't feel like a dream.
I'm lying in bed (whether it was a dream or reality will never be known) and suddenly I hear footsteps that were light and yet loud enough to be heard approach the bedroom. Instead of a person, it was a large ball of blue and white light that was hazy about half a metre wide and not a perfect sphere. Just a hazy roundish light. The essence of the light had the essence of the person that I had known. I wasn't scared. I eagerly called out his name and the voice came clearly into my mind, "It's ok. I'm alright." I call out his name again and instead of answering me, the light floated towards the window accompanied with the sound of footsteps leaving the room.
Then the light and sound was gone and by then I was wide awake. Unsure whether it was a figment of my imagination or whether it was real. The footsteps were very realistic and never have I ever dreamed myself lying in bed. When I dream, I'm always elsewhere and never simply in the bedroom lying on the bed. Either way, I am reassured by what happened and I feel that he is at peace now.
Do you believe in spirits? Does this sound fantastical? It's hard to believe that something like this happened or that I dreamed it up. The memory is so sharp.
To everyone and anyone who has lost loved ones, my thoughts and prayers are with you. May this year improve and bring happier times. RIP to those that we love and have cared about and may their spirits find happiness wherever they have gone.